Pamelite Fantasy Football 2024 - Start of Season





Pamelite Fantasy Football 2024 - Start of Season

Look at that text up there in yellow.  Guttural. Screaming.  Sums up our league pretty well I think.  

NFL football is back tomorrow.  And the reality here is pretty clear.... nothing will ever be the same after this.  I'm ready to fuckin get er' goin boys eeeeoowwwowowwwowwww.



To kick things off let's take a look into the NFL.  For almost every team other than the Saints and Patriots there's some intrigue that makes their season pretty interesting to pay attention to. At least for now.  In 20 words or less:

Steelers:  QBs and WRs are fun, but defense will tell the story of the season. That works for me.

Bills:  they're headed down the toilet bowl or Josh Allen is that good.

Colts: my fantasy team is headed down the toilet bowl or Anthony Richardson is that good.

Chiefs:  got a feeling this offense going nuclear this year.

Cowboys: same old cowboys.

Lions:  hard not to root for these dudes and Dan Campbell to take the NFC.  

Falcons:  love me some Kirk Cousins but something feels off here.

Cardinals:  buckeyes are turd baskets, but man Maserati Marv.

Patriots:  Drake Maye, don't care.

Browns: it's just so exciting watching it fail.

Texans:  not many teams more fun to watch than this one, or more difficult to defend.

Raiders:  in another universe Gardner Minshew is a Steeler.  The raiders have a little grit back.

Commanders:  Jayden Daniels should be fun, but this obviously is Austin Ekeler's team.

Packers:  Jordan Love is a little less shitty than I thought a year ago.  Josh Jacobs should dominate.

Panthers:  Dionte will be good and Steelers fans will lose their minds all year.

Niners:  last year's super bowl was probably the best ever, after steelers cardinals.  This team is pretty nasty.  

Dolphins:  Need for Speed, south beach edition.  This could be greatest show on turf all over again.

Bengals:  falling apart, gonna finish with a losing record this year.

Titans:  Will Levis just might bring the noise.

Chargers:  win a national championship.  maybe cheat. deny it. bail for the NFL. Establish the run game. Not hating Jim Harbaugh that much right now.

Giants:  if not for Malik Nabers this is a top 3 snooze button.  Borrrring.

Vikings:  they're headed down the toilet bowl or Justin Jefferson is that good.

Saints:  Taysom Hill.  that's it.

Seahwaks:  kinda don't care but DK Metcalf is still huge.

Jets:  at least we don't have to watch Zach Wilson again.  I'm in for the Rodgers revival, will Garret Wilson be elite? 

Ravens:  King Henry.

Jags:  jags.

Broncos:  45 decent RBs, 1 decent WR, rookie qb, what could go wrong.

Eagles:  I'm in for Saquon.  and Dotson.  

Bears:  I thought I was gonna hate Caleb Williams on hard knocks more. 

Bucs: I'm thinking repeat of last year, NFC South champs, steal 1 playoff game.

Rams:  Matt Stafford final legit run.  Aaron Donald gone is a big deal though and prevent them from being elite.



AFC Predictions: Chiefs, Texans, Dolphins, Steelers.  AFC Champ Texans.
NFC Predictions: Eagles, Lions, Buccaneers, 49ers.    NFC Champ 49ers.
Super Bowl:  49ers 33, Texans 31


With that, let's get into Fantasy Football




 Hufman gets to carry that trophy around again this season and it's so fucking lame.  There has still never been a back to back champ before, and I don't see that changing this year.  Here's my condensed reaction to all the fantasy teams:

Hufman:  gay.

Sloppy: the Kyler / Marvin Harrison stack could be reallll interesting.  Ceedee lamb is pretty good at football.  James cook is an interesting factor this year, if he's good this team might be good.  Solid draft.

Paul:  in the third round did sloppy need a spitter so I chugged my Stone IPA and made an emotional decision to draft Kittle as the 3rd overall TE in round 5?  Maybe.  Maybe not. Maybe go fuck yourself.

Gifford:  AJ Brown + Garrett Wilson feels like a gift.  Rounded out the roster nicely after that.  Will Josh Allen still prosper?  TJ Hock nice stash.  Good team here.  

Karbomb:  respect letting Sawyer make the calls let's see what the young man's got.  Justin Jefferson, Aiyuk and Kelce is solid, curious to see what Kelce has left in the tank.  Look out for Chase Brown.  I will destroy you in week 1.

Mike:  pretty awesome WRs with Devonta Smith, Olave, DK Metcalf, a little thin at RB, unless Chubb comes back strong, but JT might be a boss this year.  And that Steelers D.

Mohney:  team has some serious potential, super solid across the board.  Tyreek, Jacobs and Stround could take this to another level.

Simon:  Puka, Nico, Hurts, Gibbs is a solid core.  Good bench depth.  You're welcome for Kincaid. 

Moyer:  swinging for the fences.  Lamar Jackson, CMC, Achane, Zay Flowers, LaPorta, JK Dobbins.  This looks like a big risk big reward team.

Monks:  Barkley and Pacheco is beastly.  Riding the old heads at WR, Diggs, Ridley, Lockett, a little DJ Moore sprinkled in.  Question is Kyle Pitts and Caleb Williams??

Chuba:  lotta cute couples here.  Playing the Lions game with a trio of Goff, Amon Ra and David Montgomery.  A little Niners with Purdy and Deebo.  Couple Evans with Evan Engram and Mike Evans.    I hate that this could work.

Wilson:  drafting a good team while at Savanah Banana's didn't seem likely, but here we are.  I sadly like everyone in your starting lineup and even your whole roster except Deshaun Watson.  What the F.



2024 Season Predictions

With that, let's get into some predictions for the season.  

Simon, I have some good news man.  This is your fucking year mother fucker!!!!!!!  You finally get a trophy.

1st - Wilson

2nd - Chuba
 
3rd - Gifford

4th - Sloppy

5th - Mohney

6th - Paul

7th - Mike

8th - Moyer

9th - Kenny

10th - Monks

11th - Hufman



12th - Simon (congrats again man)





















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